I love to sing, but I don’t consider myself a soloist. At least not in any big, bombastic sense. I’m more of a blendy, BGV type of girl, happy to disappear behind a piano, layering mellow harmonies while someone else occupies the spotlight.
I say all that by way of disclaimer, because I’m about to post a recording of my own voice, and I don’t want you to think I have a delusional view of my pipes.
One might understandably ask, “So, why are you posting the recording then?”
Good question. And I have a good answer. It’s not about my singing. It’s about the song.
One of my husband’s college students, Debbie Boatright Camacho, wrote it several months after Jacob’s near-drowning, when he was still in a coma and doctors had given us no hope for recovery. As she prayed for Jacob one evening, the song came to her “like taking dictation.” Given all the beautiful ways God has used it, I don’t doubt the source.
About five years ago I sat down at a keyboard in my brother’s studio in Austin and played and sang it all in one take. Just a simple recording to share, because people were asking.
I share it again now, because people are still asking. Don’t expect anything flashy. No smoke machines, lasers, or sequins sparkling like electric diamonds. Just a little bit of stardust, whispering hints of heaven.
Jacob’s Song. If it speaks to you, it’s yours as well.
I remember the accident and Jacob’s near drowning while we were at Trinity, but the courage and love and most of all faith in God I never truly understood until I had my son, and not just his birth but the journey my husband I had in achieving our miracle. We tried for four years to get pregnant. All was healthy and normal with Tommy but I had several problems, the largest being I was diagnosed with Ulcerative Colites and it was severe. Once that was in control and I was in remission I couldn’t ovulate. We tried everything… I had never felt so disheartned, discouraged and defeated. My body felt like it didn’t belong to me anymore. With every negative result I felt my faith weaken. So, I’m digging through boxes and find an old Trinity yearbook and I think of Jacob and his family, I think of the awesome faith and determination you and George and Jacob especially showed. I got on my knees and said ok. Ok God, you have a plan for me, I don’t know what it is, I don’t know if it’s Your will for me to be a mommy but I’m Yours. I give it all to You. Reese Alexander Cuiksa will be 14 months old on July 27th. Letting go was the best thing I could have ever done.
Alexa, thank you so much for sharing this story with me. I treasure hearing how God used our difficult journey to strengthen other people in theirs. What a beautiful, happy outcome for you! Congratulations and much, much love.
Jeanne, I saw this link on twitter yesterday and finally got a chance to sit & listen. I can barely type through my tears – it’s beautiful. I don’t know how you got through it. Oh wait, yes I do. Thank you for sharing. Your pipes are pretty impressive. I’m saving this one for sure.
Thank you, Candy. There are plenty of times I haven’t gotten through it without tears. It’s been fourteen years now, and there is still “more God wants to say.” How kind and patient He is to heal our hearts, one beat at a time.
Enjoy, with my blessing.
Love,
Jeanne
Beautiful song. Thank you for sharing.
Jeanne,
I came across your website thru Tyler Martin – we went to church together for a long time in Colorado Springs, but I had been out of touch with he and Tiffany until I read about Claire’s accident.
I have not endured anything like what your family and the Martin family have endured, but I want you to know how wonderful it is to see people who, despite the fact that it is probably much easier to choose otherwise, choose to fully embrace the story that God is writing for their families. You and the Martins have chosen instead not only to embrace it in its fullness (I’m sure this has been quite a process), but you have also invited others, even complete strangers, into your story.
I have met a few people who have amazed me with their courage, and each time I meet another, I ask the Lord to help me be like them in the event of a family tragedy. Thank you.
Lori Kennedy
P.S. I grew up in Marshall!
Thank you so much for these encouraging and confirming words, Lori! The Martin family stays on my heart constantly. How beautiful that so many people have rallied around them to pray and offer words of hope and support.
Crazy that you grew up in Marshall! We’ve been here since 1992. When did you leave?
Arrived here via Glynn this morning and it is exactly where I needed to be … the song, the words, everything … beautiful … thank you.